Tags
buddha, forgiveness, gandhi, inspiration, love, poetry, self improvement, spiritual, well being, Zen
To understand everything is to forgive everything.
–Buddha
It has been said that the measurement of a human being is how they act in times of adversity. It is easy to be kind, peaceful and loving when the seas are calm but how does one act when the storm rushes in and the waves thrash about? How does one act when one is challenged to the core of their soul?
This is the question I pondered today as I sat at a crossroad. I understood that the foundation to peace is compassion, love and forgiveness. I have watched from a distance and talked about how I would act in times of extreme adversity. I looked on in admiration of the mother in Georgia who when given the opportunity to speak to the murderer of her child spoke only kindness and gave him forgiveness.
I remembered the words of Jesus in Matthew 18: 21-22 when Peter came to him and asked “Lord, how oft shall my brother sin against me that I forgive him? Till seven times?”
Jesus answered “I say unto thee not seven times but seventy seven times.”
I thought I would act the same, let go of any anger no matter the issue. Buddha’s words were fresh in my mind when he tells us anger is like a holding onto a hot coal with the intent of throwing at someone else. In the end we are the ones who gets hurt.
Through all these thoughts I still sat today in anger and frustration. I had been accused of something I did not do with threats to withhold something very dear to me. My initial reaction was anger. It was to defend myself. It was to fight. My mind was telling me I had ever right to be angry. It spent a lot of time justifying its reaction.
In despair, I sat and read Mahatma Gandhi’s quote over and over again:
The weak can never forgive. Forgiveness is the attribute of the strong.
I breathed. I read. I wrote. I breathed again and again. Once I calmed my mind, this misadventurous culprit who loves to be out control and create havoc, I could see clearly again. I allowed myself to put aside these emotions and realize these feelings were not me. I could freshly look at the situation again and forgive any wrong doing.
Forgiveness is the attribute of the strong. It is the root in understanding everything. If one holds onto this anger, these feelings inside then they end up controlling us. They eat us up from the inside and create barriers for us to love, to connect to other beings. No righteousness is worth this price.
I can now create new actions clear from my feelings. I can create and communicate something different out of this situation all from the power of forgiveness. I can open my heart and love without any limitation. I am in control of my life and I choose forgiveness….I choose love.
Call to Action:
-
Where in your life are you holding onto something because of anger or righteousness? Is being right in your mind worth this price? Let all of these thoughts and emotions go.
-
Where in your life can you take the step in giving forgiveness? Give unconditional forgiveness and love.
-
Let go of all barriers to love. Give compassion, love and forgiveness every moment of every day.
Thomas D. Craig
Author A Cup of Buddha
Writer. Seeker. Warrior
Zen Warrior 
So importantly true. Spending yourself on moral judgment is a pointless waste of time. Forgiveness is, as the Tao teaches, “the great secret.”
Love it…thank you for comments.
I used to forgive, but still ask and wonder why the other person chooses to hurt, but now I am reaching the point where the reasons are no longer important. It is a nice feeling
This is a great realization….thx for the comments.
How do I do this? I mentally beat myself up over others actions, and how they make me feel. I don’t want to hurt, and hold on to pain. I want to enjoy and appreciate every moment in life, but instead I allow myself to feel alone, and resentful. Any suggestions would be wonderful.
Thanks!
hi pamela, i was dealing with that issue myself for many long. i always try to pratice mindfulness but when the troubles are big it was hard to concentrate on reality because the feelings and the negative thoughts were always popping up.
so here´s how i do it :). first reconize your own state, ask yourself “am i feeling in peace, totally in peace?”
if yes keep that way :). if not, then listen to yourself, what is bothering you? then reconize the feeling associated “i´m feeling… (angry, upset, frustrated…) about a particular situation or person”. once you verbalize the feeling you feel a first freedom from it :). then try to understand what cause it. once you understand the causes you automatically forgive and feel totally liberated of that experience. most of the times you´ll understand what cause your own suffering was other people´s suffering. then ressentment gives place to compassion, peace and joy. namaste 🙂
Thank you Pedro
I totally get it Pamela. This is all our challenge. Our mind takes over and runs our life through our thoughts, feelings and emotions. Rather than staying present and seeing the beauty in all that is before us RIGHT NOW we hold onto anger, judgment, and pain. We are not willing to let this go and in turn we feel alone, and resentful. I totally get it. This is the struggle and as Gandhi stated forgiveness is an act of the strong.
We hold onto these thoughts as we get to be right about something, whether it be we are unloved, or not good enough, or whatever. Holding onto these actions we win this game that we are playing.
The first thought I have is that these thoughts, feelings and emotions are not YOU. This is simply your mind holding on and grasping suffering and pain. First get that this is not YOU. YOU are committed to something on this planet much bigger than this. This is for you to determine and stand in this commitment. If you are standing in this commitment then when these thoughts and emotions come up you can set them aside as you are standing for something bigger. For example-if you are standing for Love and Connection on this planet then you no longer have permission to be angry and upset as you are clearing, a stand for this on the planet.
Personally, my way of fighting my own game that tries to take over my mind is to clear it through meditation. Find time every day to meditate. The more you do this, the less inclined the mind is to take over and the more you will connect to everyone and everything. Blessings to you for playing this kind of game on this planet and for standing for something bigger than the ordinary. Be well….Be Love…Thomas
I practice understanding I do my best to understand the person that hurt me and every time the hurt come to my mind instead of be angry I star to understand that they can not give me something that they don’t have and I practice deep breathing.
This is great Nelly, thank you for sharing.
hi, that´s exactly what i do :). first i identify my own feeling and then i try to understand what made me feel that way. to understand is indeed to forgive, wether is ourselfs or the others. it works and it´s super liberating 🙂
Pingback: The Cycle Of Life – Michelle's Blog
Pingback: All we can do is learn from our past and work in the present to make a better future. – Mind Exposure